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On Life
“Life is intricately expansive, woven seamlessly through time. Ever so that not even one mind can deny the miracle(s) God will do, does and has done.”
Living is a such a precious gift. Today, I mourn those close to me that transitioned onto God last year and this year. I wish I had the chance to say goodbye and have a meal or walk together. Well, I didn’t. I miss them but moreso I miss being down to earth with them.
I wonder had I been more transparent about my own struggles would it had made a difference for my one friend. Perhaps, she wouldn’t have felt so alone and know that we struggle and get through this together. Maybe, just maybe, my beloved family member would know how much I cared for her and will make her proud of me. The thoughts and list can go on but why.
You understand, I mean, I understand that we all struggle. If one hurts, we all do; humanity. But what’s not human is living in a bubble, hoping to save the world or yourself or others.
Only through action can true healing and saving occur to me. I can hope and see but in the mist of my day, each yes and no I answer shapes my mood, my day, my destiny.
So, I salute mental stability, sound judgement and emotional responsibility .
Thanks for taking the time to stop by. It makes me happier to know you did too. . Leave a comment share or like.
RISE SHINE AND GRIND #repeat #ruthyharriswny
Safely Astray
Safety first is a motto I like to abide by. I veered astray from my usual life routine recently and lived to not regret it but to embrace the lesson learned from it.
Do not post online when I´m ¨in my feelings¨ sorta speak. With new life stressors and the Spring season upon me, I encountered an altered mood swing. A manic episode. My bipolar struggle is real and I at no means do I take it lightly at any age in my life since it can hit like a tornado, destroying work life aspirations, friendships and family ties like a whirlwind. I looked around and saw pieces left behind and gathered what I could salvage and moved on with my life´s journey.
Needless to say, I went from elated emotions of high altitudes to low tides and am grateful for medical professionals and those closest to me able to endure the cycle with me.
Perseverance is vital. Perseverance by definition according to https://www.merriam-webster.com/ is: continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition : the action or condition or an instance of persevering: STEADFASTNESS
Perhaps, Steadfastness is a better suited title for this entry but I want to emphasize safety to those who may struggle with ¨Bipolarness¨ since safety by definition is : the condition of being safe from undergoing or causing hurt, injury, or loss.
Although it may seem impossible to be prevent loss or hurt I can minimize the negative impacts of a decompensation of my bipolar episode. I tend to first use self talk and secondly, point of reference when I am assessing how valid some of my thoughts and feelings are. And, not last or least, my support system and medical help.
I hope this journey entry has blessed and helped you like it does me. Until next week. Stay encouraging yourself and others! l
Love, peace and light
2/3rd’s Surviving Crazy
That title can be totally disregarded as Crazy because it doesn’t have an factual reference except what I have conceived in my head. Perhaps, that if lucky maybe 2 out of 3 people obtain a keener sense of reality after a mental breakdown with delusional tendencies.
I came up with this odd fraction from my experience in mental health facilities observing my peers as I received treatment and of course in the “outside world”.
I count myself of the lucky group considered functional within society with medical treatments.
See, I felt I was crazy when I had my first couple nervous breakdowns. I couldn’t understand what was going on within my own thoughts; my perception of reality was in turn skewed and my mood resulted as topsy turvy.
My heart always goes out to those that seemed to still be out of touch with reality . Once in a while I am blessed to encounter a discharged patient on the outside. Last friend didn’t recognize me 😦
Nonetheless it was great to see she was surviving too!
#bipolar #thestruggleisreal #survivor #ruthyharriswny #2021 #mentalhealth #blog
The Pursuit is Okay
This week’s blog is about how I had reached, reached out for emotional help. However, when in doing so, I didn’t received the help I expected.
It was at that point, I realized that emotions have a bizarre way of affecting my perception. In fact, so much of an effect that it appeared to stunt my ability to convey what support I was in need of and my personal ability to receive assistance was skewed.
Being explicitly ME, this is when the chase began. I had desired to be well. My loved ones hoped I’d get better. I had fallen further away from who I am that when looked at myself, I could not recognize the woman I had become. And, for me, that was mortifying.
On the brighter side of things, this self introspection and lack of progression in my own personal identity drew me to research.
Upon doing a simple Google search, I stumbled upon a concept , Looking-glass self, which can be read in detail at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Looking-glass_self
My understanding is I had spent much of my time concerned with how I was viewed by others and I actually shaped how I felt and saw myself based on how I thought others around me perceived, felt and thought about me.
After careful consideration, I find this strategy of self-identification, Bipolar or not, to be extremely dangerous and problematic. There I was sulking based on perceived perceptions, whether good or bad because of a stigma I had about myself.
My resolve is in my pursuit of owning my truth, not based on hearsay or my imagination. Rather, each day, I strive to cope with my insecurities.
Yes, having a Bipolar mental health diagnosis was tough on me for many years. The silver lining, for me, lies in my personal perception of myself, drawing on my strengths and forgiving my weaknesses.
I am learning to allow myself to be authentically me. I believe we are all unique and each of our lives are necessary. Matter of fact, I had to keep it real with my self in order to move forward.
Today, I am healthier than two months ago. Mentally, I am allowing healing and my true recovery from my disorder by striving to see a more true reality, a keen perception. Physically, I am mindful to exercise several times a week, and despite how difficult its been, it actually has been Great and results in my Feeling Good.
I hope you know that you matter, even if this is the first time you heard it today! I appreciate your attentiveness. Until next week, I wish you wonderful days, and peaceful nights and enjoy this weekend, too!
#strive #bipolar #health #wellness #ruthyharriswny
Sometimes Less Can be More
So my thoughts as this year comes to a close, for my personal account, on my journey is simply I am on my way. To where I ask myself. And the answer is to recovering from all that I had been through up until today.
Yes, away from the feeling of regret and coming to a self identifying moment, knowing that it “all” can work toward the greater purpose of my life. I’m reminded of my primary purpose which is the impact I have on those around me. And if not a effect but it is an implication that I do matter. We all do. How I view myself and collectively my experiences; well, it matters.
So, here I am partly wishing I had posted more these past few months but without posting I was able to shift to a place within myslef which I know is intently who I am. I desire to be explicitly full of my truth when I write to you, my audience. I’m here. I showed up. And that is the point of this weeks post. Sometime less can be more. Even if just being present.
Don’t Take Help For Granted
October 2020
I learned over time ( A Looooong Time) that help comes in many forms and different ways from a wide variety of people.
When first being diagnosed, I experienced it was extremely difficult to learn this FACT because I was paranoid. Primarily, This was a result of the my illness and traumatic events that I had been through. I couldn’t process reality let alone understand what was going on, in and around me to receive the proper help that was offered time and time again. Don’t let that be your story because 20 years can go by. Why not be well but you could be well much much sooner. Hey, better late than never Haha 🙂 Smile…. if you’re anything like me when I was sick.
I am writing to you to assist in you knowing that regimes offered are not bad for you. In fact, it is a trial and error process for most because we are all different people the professionals try their best – so let the doctors help you, okay.
They spend tons of money, probably millions, in research and many people do trials to help in the development of the recommended processes in getting well when bipolar.
Lean in to support from positive persons in your life, which will be a whole different blog entry within itself. Take heed & to still listen to your right mind while figuring which advice works for you.
‘Til next post
#strive #bipolar #health #wellness
Affirmation to Oneself
July 2020
I humbly thank you for taking time to explore Life with me from my perspective.
Last week I published my 2nd YouTube video. It has 1 view, which was probably my own 😆
But this is not a competition for views or seeking fame. My goal is to reach new heights in my Life and improve my habits and achieve new goals.
Now, if in fact, I can help just one person feel and reach for their dreams after being diagnosed Bipolar, I truly am glad to have been supportive by sharing my journey to recovery.
Visit my YouTube Channel & Subscribe https://youtu.be/h8XW9F4SDBA
We have to give ourselves permission to grow. To accept ourselves so we can be exactly who we are. To be comfortable once again in our own self is essential to growth.
I am accepting of where I am.
I can dream of who I want to be.
I imagine where I am going.
And now I can set goals.
Mapping a blueprint and paving a way to my Life’s Purpose & Success
Until next post, have a beautiful week and stay tuned to future posts and my vlogs 🌟❤🌟
#worksinprogress
Beginning Points That Matter
July 20, 2020
Now, being diagnosed can be surprising, even startling for some. Myself, I was awestruck not understanding or even knowing what Bipolar Disorder was.
I was actually to the point I had to be hospitalized and given medications to deal with my symptoms.
I spent over two weeks inpatient and back then I wanted to get out fast. But looking back, I’m glad that they kept me that long since I was in a center part where there were classes with information about types of mental illnesses and coping skills one could acquire to maintain a healthier lifestyle after diagnosis.
So, medication was mandatory while there and I was discharged with refills. Now, if I could keep to the regimen all could be better, I hoped.
On my YouTube channel (link below) this week’s vlog,publishes each Wednsday, will touch upon some experiences I had prior to my diagnosis leading up to my inpatient stay.
My Journey to Recovery
Today, July 13, 2020, I choose to embark upon my Life’s journey toward positive self development and reaching toward my Life’s Successes.
I believe we all, each and every single individual, has special talents. In 2015, I named my mission Blossom Achieve Excel. I stand firm in the thought everyone has a Blossom within waiting to Achieve greatness and Excel to new heights. Follow me weekly, as I give a candid and detailed exploration and account of my road to my Life’s Success.
I was diagnosed Bipolar in 2001 and it’s been a struggle; Nonetheless, I have decided to help myself to achieve my Life’s purpose of giving and helping others through my raw account of my disability’s low points and eventually my successful outcome with developing a healthier lifestyle and career success.
#Failforward2020 #Newbeginnings #Success #RUTHYHARRISWRITES #July2020 #Blogger #Writer
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